Broken Bridge
by TempeJill
Summary: This is what she becomes in the wake of it all... how she realizes that she is not the person that she wishes she could be... and that she never will be. How can they ever become what the rest of the world sees in them, now? 100th Episode Tag. Complete.
1. Chapter 1

**This will not be the last of my post-100th-episode writing, I'm fairly certain. This might not even stay a oneshot, for all I know right now. To everyone waiting for another chapter of What Brings Them Together... sorry, but don't expect one anytime soon. Life happened, and then this little distraction.**

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She stood, a lone figure, on a bridge with the wind and the rain tumbling around her. Her hair whipped out behind her, and tears traced sideways across her face, their trajectories changed by the force of the weather that was warring with them.

She was not there to jump. She was not suicidal.

She was there to think, and be alone, and not have to worry about the world.

And yet, that was all she could do... worry about the world. Her world.

Nothing was the same, nothing at all. She was shattered, broken... pieces of her scattered across the world. There was a large helpless bit trapped in a dark closet of an old brick house... another that had lodged itself in the confines of a pit filled with death... yet more which had gathered across the rooms of her lonely apartment, filling every corner of it and yet leaving her still lost and confused. None of it kept her company. Most of her, though, clung like a shadow behind him, adding dark contours to the edges of his form. Most of her was with him, as every memory that now traced its way across her grief-stricken mind was of the two of them.

That was her world.

Them.

But she had known... known from the very start, that they couldn't be anything more. She had wanted it, and that had been what scared her the most. Wanting to be with him... wanting him to love her. Wanting to understand how to love him back. And yet, that feeling inside of her, the way that he made her warm and complete... the way he took away the loneliness... she couldn't classify it. It might have been love. It might have been everything that she'd been told about. She just didn't know... and she needed him to tell her.

But she couldn't ask that of him, because she didn't deserve the answer.

He loved her.

It was a fact that she was well-aware of. A fact she had been afraid of for years... had denied ruthlessly in a last-ditch attempt to pretend it wasn't true. Because if it was, then something might happen one day.

And now it had.

And she had done what she had always known she would.

What else could she have said? What could she have done to make it all go away, and make things stay exactly as they were? She had known... all along... that things couldn't work out. For her, they never did.

She hated psychology, but this wasn't quite on that plane. This was from years of research, of experiments... and they all concluded exactly the same thing. She was broken beyond repair. She told him, told everyone, of the high failure rate in relationships... but she saw the successes, even the small ones. They haunted her, everyday. She would watch a couple walking down the street, hand in hand, and linger, wondering what that must feel like. To not be afraid, to just live in the moment... she'd tried it before, long ago, and she had been destroyed by it. She had been left completely alone, heartbroken, wondering what she had done wrong.

Only, she hadn't done anything wrong. The wrong was simply who she was. And she was incapable of love.

They all said it... all of them.

_"You're completely incapable of human emotion, aren't you?"_

_ "You disgust me."_

_ "You're just a filthy whore."_

_ "You're emotionally cold and distant."_

_ "Get a soul!"_

A fresh wave of tears rolled over her.

_"I gotta move on. I gotta find someone who's gunna love me... in thirty years, or forty, or fifty..."_

A broken sob found its way out of her, and she gripped the railing tightly, her knuckles turning white as she held on to the only thing she could, the only lifeline she had available.

All because it couldn't be him anymore.

That was over.

_"Can we still work together?"_

_ The pause was enough of an answer. Enough to tell her that he didn't want to. That he didn't think he could. "Yeah," he said at last, looking away from her and up to the starry heavens._

Now she knew that they couldn't do even that. Because Sweets had been right... they'd had their moment. It had been almost six years ago. They'd had it... and it had gone by. And the last five years had simply been an attempt. A failed, floundering attempt at something that they could never have, because it hadn't been there to begin with.

And it was all because of her.

He had wanted to spend thirty, forty... fifty years with her. He had _wanted her_. He had _loved her_. That feeling... she'd gotten used to it. She'd gotten used to seeing the warmth in his eyes, the glow of his smile, and hearing the smoothness of his voice, and she shouldn't have. She had been selfish. She had _hurt him._

How could she be expected to be what he needed, when all she did was destroy everything around her? How could she try for this, when all it would do was lead to more heartbreak for the _both_ of them?

She was damaged. She didn't deserve him, didn't deserve anyone.

He knew this... he'd said so, although not in so many words. He had agreed, had nodded and looked away... had known that she couldn't change. Couldn't be the person he needed. And that? That was what tore her soul apart in more ways that she'd thought possible. Because it was one thing to know that she was broken, that she would only hurt him. It was another entirely for him to accept it as well, to tell her she was right... to tell her that she wasn't the one after all. That he was going to move on, without her.

That was what she deserved, though. A life alone, isolated, where she couldn't hurt anyone. He would... he would find a woman to love him, and he would have a family, and kids... things that she could never give him.

They were through. It didn't matter that he'd said they could still work together... they couldn't. He would never move on if she was still in the picture, because he would feel guilty. He would always be that man. And she couldn't do that to him any longer.

Happiness couldn't come from her.

And suddenly, all she could see were the days and the late nights, the cases, the smiles, the laughter, the singing, the hugs, the reassurances, the soft little comments that meant so much more, Jasper, Brainy Smurf, argument after argument where they tested each other, where she felt so much more alive... and she felt his warm arms around her as she let her pain overflow, from her mother's murder, from her fear of losing her brother, from one of her early realizations that she simply couldn't have a relationship that was meant to work... she could smell Thai food, and hear a knock at her door as the clock showed midnight... she could feel the clink of his glass against hers as they toasted success, as they shared ideas, as they relaxed on a weekend. She could picture her kitchen counter, with the two of them seated on opposite sides, laughing about nothing in particular. She could see his face, shining with relief as they lay in the sand in an old quarry, covered in dirt and rubble... she could see the look of pride in his eyes as she talked to a suspect, as she got the information they needed, as she held up the evidence on a piece of bone and pointed out the details... she could see the amusement sparkling there as she stated yet another "I don't know what that means," and as she teased him about something or other... as she managed to make a successful joke...

They had been happy. Beyond happy. He was the only thing that had ever made her feel happy, in her entire life. He was her everything, her only. And the realization that she didn't deserve him, that she was helpless and damaged and everything that he would never want for the long term...

Her legs gave way underneath her as she collapsed beside the railing, still clinging to it desperately as her shoulders shook and the tears came far too rapidly for her to fight off.

It was one thing to be afraid. It was another to know that the end was coming no matter what one did to fight it. That was another level of fear altogether.

She had never wanted to die so badly, to just curl up and cease to exist. Because maybe, just maybe, that would ease the agony in her heart.

Yes, she loved him. She couldn't deny it any longer. She _needed _him. And the fact that he didn't need her...

It broke the very last piece of her that had remained whole and beautiful. And now she was nothing at all.

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**Comments? Should I continue with perhaps some sort of resolve, or an arrival of Booth, perhaps? I'm not sure... this whole situation between them is horrible. I'm not sure what to think at this point, as far as the show goes... :(**


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow... okay, so the response to the last chapter was pretty amazing. All I can say is thank you, and I'm so glad you all seemed to enjoy it so much :) I hope this one will make things a little better, and then there will be either one or two more following that. **

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He sat alone on his couch, staring at a dark television screen and taking slow swigs from his second bottle of beer. He'd been tempted to just delve right into his best scotch, but there was a part of him still hoping to maybe talk to her tonight. Hoping that she might come to him, and they might... they might be able to actually make this work.

He wasn't quite sure what had happened, but the sting of rejection was still very present, even though the hours had melted past at a slow but steady rate. Now it was nearly midnight, and he wasn't sure what to do with himself. He was hurt, and lonely, and the future looked dark and helpless.

What exactly was he going to do without her? For so long, his life had been leading to this point, and he'd always been terrified of it. This, however, was not the way he'd expected things to work. In his imaginations of the future, he'd always either hoped for an admission on her part, or he'd feared that she'd be afraid of commitment and run.

_"You thought you were protecting me, but you're the one who needs protecting!"_

_ "Protecting from what?"_

_ "From me!"_

He closed his eyes and buried his head in his hands. How could she think that? How could she believe that he needed to be protected from her, when all he ever wanted to do was protect her from the world? She'd already been through so much... why couldn't he be the one that showed her that things could work out? Why couldn't he be the one that ended differently, that was successful?

But she didn't want to try. She didn't even want to make an attempt. And up to the end, she was determined to protect the job. She had said that they wouldn't be able to work together any more, and he'd interrupted by kissing her. And then, when she had turned him down, when they were just standing there lost in their thoughts, she'd asked if they could still work together. He had, however, recognized that last one for what it was.

She was trying to return some sense of normalcy, and it gave him hope, because it meant, from the desperate way that she had asked him, that she wanted to keep that connection with him.

But he wasn't going to wait for her, not anymore. He was going to start moving on his own path, and if she... well, if she came to a decision, then he would easily go with her on it. Because any chance at all was better than none when it came to Bones.

And regardless of what he'd told her, she was the one for him. He wasn't going to find someone to replace her, or someone that would make him feel a remote fraction of what she made him feel. That would never happen. But... if he couldn't have her, he was going to have to start doing something. There was always a chance, even if it was so miniscule as to be nearly non-existent, that something new might come to him and change his life. He'd never expected Bones to come along, after all, after Rebecca refused to marry him.

It felt like he'd come to a sudden turning point, which originated directly from the first source itself. He'd come full circle, and it had ended the same exact way. With him alone and rejected, and wondering if he ever had stood a chance to begin with.

Did she feel at all the same way that he did? He hadn't been able to tell as fully as he would have liked, but he knew she at least felt something. She wouldn't have spent all those years laughing and smiling with him, enjoying his company, if she didn't feel some sort of connection. If she didn't enjoy being around him. But did she love him? She'd said she wanted to protect him, after all, and that had been her reason for turning down what he had proposed... so it stood to reason that she loved him to some degree, and she wanted to protect him from a failure like the relationships she'd had before.

What she didn't seem to understand was that they all failed because those guys, all of them, weren't good enough. They didn't understand her, didn't appreciate what they had with her. And, inevitably, they went their separate ways, usually because she ended the relationships herself. That wouldn't happen if she was with him, though. If they were together... he would spend every night teaching her how much she meant to him, and every morning cooking her elaborate breakfasts and taking her out to nice restaurants for lunch and dinner... show her what it meant to live as a family, to be loved every minute of every day without any holding back like the past years had been filled with. And she would understand, and she would be his just as much as he was hers.

And he had always belonged to her. From the very beginning.

That was one of the many things that he couldn't imagine changing.

What would it be like to wake up in the morning, and not immediately picture her face, or think about the last moment when he saw her, or imagine about the day that was to come, working on the latest case with her? It was unthinkable. His thoughts had revolved around her for years now, and that wasn't something he foresaw going away easily.

It would just become his torture from now on, knowing that there was no more future proclamation of love looming ahead. He had done it, and it had failed him. And apparently, her as well.

He didn't get any sleep at all, and he didn't have much hope for sleep tomorrow either. Or anytime in the near future.

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"Sweetie, he loves you," Angela murmured softly.

"I know," she choked, still brushing away tears. "Ange, I've _always_ known."

Angela made a soft sound of sympathy, and rested her hand gently on her arm. "Bren, you can make this-"

"No, I can't!" she practically shouted. Instantly she felt horrible about the outburst, sniffling in an undignified manner as she tried to stem another wave of tears. "I can't," she whispered dejectedly, as if she needed to prove it to someone. Or to herself.

"What are you going to do, then?" her best friend whispered.

"I don't... I don't know," she murmured, her voice cracking. "He said... he told me that we could still- still work together, but I- I don't think I... we just..." she broke off, shaking her head back and forth as a sob made its way out of her throat and her shoulders began to shake again. Beside her, Angela shifted on the couch and reached behind her to rub her back soothingly. It only made it worse— this was what Booth would be doing for her in a similar situation.

What _could_ she do from here? The Jeffersonian was her home, but it was the place that she associated with him. It was the place that had come to be _theirs_, not just hers. She couldn't work there anymore, couldn't come in everyday, see him, and deal with the stiff silences and the awkward moments... because everything good would be gone. It wouldn't be coming back.

Their work, it was important to her. It always had been. But them? The two of them? Her job would not be the same if there was no bickering, no celebrations at the Diner, no case discussion at one of their apartments or the Founding Fathers... it wouldn't the same. Nothing could _ever_ be the same.

"I might move away," she finally said, her voice soft, but surprisingly calm.

"Move... Brennan, where would you go? I mean... you're- you're just going to... leave?"

She closed her eyes. This wasn't what she wanted to hear. But then she opened them and said the last thing she'd ever expected to say, after all of these years, after all the moments they'd shared, all the advice and comfort she'd given her...

"You should go to Paris."

Angela stared at her for a long moment, and then whispered seriously, "Paris? Brennan, why would I-?"

"Because that's where you always wanted to go," she cut in. "Back when we first met... that was the reason we became friends. Because I got you a job so you could earn money to go to Paris. And now... now you have more than enough to travel to any place you could possibly want to go. Follow that dream you started out on."

"But what about you and-"

"Forget it," she said firmly, her voice finally growing stronger, as she began to make an actual plan. "Ange, this isn't something I want you to be caught up in as well. You can do something you love, and I will be more than happy to know that I helped you with that."

"Sweetie, Booth isn't the only one that loves you. I do too. And Hodgins, and Cam, and even those crazy interns. We all love you. And I'm not going to be _able_ to just... to just _forget_ all of that."

"Well maybe you should figure out how to," she snapped, getting to her feet and moving away, not really sure where to go now that she was standing. She was in her own apartment, after all.

"This isn't about me, is it?" Ange questioned quietly. "This is about trying to make yourself forget. Right?"

She turned back around, too tired to fight her friend. "I don't even know. I hate psychology, and right now... right now I don't know what to do anymore."

"Have you considered that maybe if you tried to-"

"No," she ground out, her stress and pain turning themselves into anger as a last attempt to regain control over herself. "I told him that I didn't know how to change, that I couldn't, and he told me I was right, and that he- that he was going to move on. He's going to find someone who is capable of loving him back, someone that's... that's not..." she struggled to fight the fresh wave of tears before practically shouting, "Someone that's not _broken!"_

"You aren't-"

"Prove it! Prove that I'm not! Have you been paying attention to the past five years? I have dated... I have dated a lot of men. And they all either turned out to be... _crazy_, or they just... Ange, nothing ever works out!"

Angela looked like she was going to say something, but Brennan couldn't stop. She plowed onwards.

"Think about it! All my friends, everyone that I've ever gotten close to, it's all because of my _work_. It's all because of _murders_. I would never have... never have even met you if it wasn't for that, and you wouldn't have even... you wouldn't have _wanted_ to know me! And then Booth... when we first met all he wanted was to sleep with me! And we missed our moment! We missed it, and we can't get it back and I'm just not _good enough_ for him!"

The silence was deafening.

"Booth loves you," she finally said. The statement was quiet, but undeniably firm.

"We've already addressed that," she responded, still breathing heavily from her rant, the emotions not nearly drained from her system. They were just getting started.

"No, Brennan, we haven't. He loves you because of _who you are_. Not because of your work, or because he wants to get you into bed. He loves you because he is head-over-heels _in love_ with you! I really don't know how to say it any other way, but I know what I see. And that man wants to spend forever with you. He does _not_ want to move on and find someone else to love him. He wants you. More than anything else in the world."

"I can't, though," she said, her voice choked again as her throat closed up and she began to feel the start of a fresh wave of tears coming over her. "He has a heart, and he's always followed it, and I _don't_. I never had one, and I don't know how to... how to do any of the things he does. He wants a steady monogamous relationship... he probably wants _marriage_ and _children_... and I can't do that! He _knows_ I can't do that! And he... he accepts it! He wasted five years of his life over me and I didn't _stop _him!"

"Because you love him, too!"

They both stood now, facing each other, Angela's face covered with pleading, trying to make her understand.

"That doesn't matter!" she forced out, the break in the middle of her words sending her voice an octave higher.

"The hell it doesn't! You have to be willing to _try_, Brennan! You have to give up something of yourself to another person... and you already _have!_ That's what you can't see! You can't see that you gave your heart to Booth years ago, and you trust him with all you have! You can't... you just _can't_ give that away now. You can't."

She tried to figure out a response, but nothing came to mind. Nothing countered what her friend was saying. When had she so fully given herself to him? She had come to expect him to be there, and to want to see him smile... she had come to trust that he would be there for her, and that he would find her if something went wrong.

"He looked so... he looked lost," she whispered helplessly. "When I told him that I... that I couldn't do it."

"Because he doesn't know what to do without you," she answered immediately.

Silence.

"What do I... where do I go from here?" she asked at last.

Angela smiled in relief. "I knew it," she said with a sigh. "And thank God. Alright, first thing you need to do is figure out if you really _can_ do this. And then you go and find Booth, and you sort out this whole mess."

"How do I even know if I can do this?"

"How much do you love him?" Angela countered. "Here, maybe this will help," she added upon seeing the helpless look on her friend's face. "How do you feel when you think about Booth moving on, or about never seeing him again?"

She made a face, wincing at the very idea.

"I still have nightmares about that karaoke night and the... the following days," she said, speaking the first thing that came to her mind. It felt surprisingly good to get it out; she had never told anyone about that.

Angela raised her eyebrows in surprise, but the expression on her face was also an invitation to continue, and she hesitantly did so, not entirely comfortable with the idea. She'd been hiding all of this for years. It felt like she was stepping out into the open, vulnerable and helpless, by shedding light on these secrets.

"Tonight... I had never expected it to happen. When Sweets brought it up, and then Booth went through with it... I was terrified. I didn't know what answer to give, or what to do, and I just knew that it wasn't right, and that this... that I could end up hurting him because he would want so much more than I'm capable of, than what someone else could give him.

"And then when he said that he had to find someone... someone else... I just didn't know what to do. He- he deserves it. He sh-should be happy... I j-just didn't..." her voice was losing its strength once more, and she wondered desperately how much more agony she could possibly go through. The tears were filling her eyes, blurring her vision.

"You can do this," Angela said with conviction. "I know it. You two... you need each other. More than either of you knows. And if you let this come between you, and you move off to God-knows-where and he starts dating again... all he'll ever think about is you, and all you'll ever think about is him. Because you belong together, and that's the way it is."

For once, she didn't argue with her friend's logic. She didn't have the heart, or even the inclination, to bother, because this time she wanted to agree. She wanted it to be true, because if science would just stop telling her that fate didn't exist and that bad things were bound to happen if one messed with the common equations and statistics... then everything would be so much easier.

Then maybe she could be that woman on the street, holding hands with him, laughing and just _enjoying_ everything.

Maybe she could just let go of her fears and everything that was holding her back.

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**Just so we're clear, I have no idea how I'm actually going to sort this out xD I'm sure I'll think of something, though, don't worry.**

**And, if anyone's interested, I'm thinking of doing another fic off of this episode; one where she actually DOES leave. Angst galore; just what I love. Let me know if you'd like to read that; perhaps I'll dedicate some time to it shortly. **


	3. Chapter 3

**This chapter is ridiculously short. I apologize. And there will be perhaps another two chapters following this. I really, really don't want to drag this out, but this chapter needed to be the way it was.**

**And how about that episode last night? So cute, right? I'm glad they did manage to address the issue between them, even though it was really briefly. At least it's not being ignored, right?**

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She had no idea what she was doing.

It was six o'clock in the morning, and she was standing in front of her closet staring at her options for the day, wondering what on earth she should wear. It was more than that, though, it was everything. This was just the small start to a world of troubles that she could see brewing. If she wore something boring, what signal would that send? But if she went for flashy, or something that showed too much skin, she wouldn't be doing herself justice either. What would Angela do in a situation like this?

To top it off, of course, was the fact that she was actually terrified of just going to work today at all. What if he brought her a case, and acted like everything was completely normal? What if he came by, and everything was just horrible between them, entirely? What if she didn't say the right thing?

What if he just didn't come at all?

There was no positive side ahead, as far as she could see.

Finally she just grabbed a green top with a low v-neck, and wore a white camisole underneath. Tan pants. Her usual dark shoes—the heels weren't ridiculously high, but they gave her an extra inch and a half that she appreciated. It would help to be eye-to-eye with him, literally as well as figuratively.

If he even came today.

What would she do if he didn't? Was it reasonable to go to his office, or should she avoid that route altogether? Should she wait for him to come to her, or should she go directly to him first?

After all, there was quite a large portion of her that was still desperate to know that he needed her. That he wanted her to change. That he didn't expect everything from her, when she knew she couldn't give it to him. She needed his help. That was all she wanted... to just know that he wanted to try, but try _with_ her. And the night before... he hadn't been willing to wait. Would he _ever_ be willing to wait? Or was the fact that she wasn't... good enough for him... would that just make this entirely impossible?

And what would happen to everything else, if this _did_ work out? They wouldn't be able to work together anymore, and that was the bulk of their relationship. How often would they even see each other? Would she still feel the same way? She'd never known anything different with him around... the adjustment would take quite some time.

She _was_ willing to try, though. She wished he could see it. It was just that... what if she did end up hurting him, in the end? She had never had a successful relationship, all her life. Her parents, her brother, every short term boyfriend she'd had, Sully... they were all failures. How could she bear to lose him entirely if things didn't go well?

And what about their partnership? Would he be sent off to another section of the FBI, with a new partner? Would _she_ get a new partner, or would they just send her back to working in Limbo?

The sacrifices up ahead were terrifying.

But the reward was breathtaking, if it worked out.

She wanted this. More than anything she'd ever wanted before. And that fact should have been enough to terrify her all over again.

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As it turned out, he didn't come to the Jeffersonian at all that day. He didn't call. Or email. Cam and Angela said they hadn't had any contact with him. The fact that she'd asked at all had been humiliating, with Cam at least, and the sympathy in her boss's eyes hadn't helped matters. She wasn't sure how Cam was even aware of the situation, but clearly she was. Not like it mattered anyways. Who really cared if everyone knew? All that mattered now was the overall outcome.

* * *

He didn't come to see her the next day. Not a word. Part of her wondered if this was some sort of test. Or punishment. Or maybe he just didn't want to be around her at all anymore. Maybe she'd broken his heart, and unlike her, he hadn't found a way to push through it and find a point to reach for. Maybe he was just broken entirely, and not willing to do a thing about it.

Maybe he was hoping that she would just go away, so he _could_ move on.

Maybe... maybe he just hated her.

* * *

He had no idea what to do. A large part of him wanted to see her, and to have things be totally normal. But he knew that wasn't going to happen. It wasn't _possible_.

It had already been two days, and he was losing hope entirely. He wondered if he should go to her, or keep waiting for her to come to him. She was the one who needed to make this choice before they could move forward... unless of course she really did want him to move on.

For God's sake, where was that fiery and independent woman he'd grown to love? She was the one who had to solve this; he had already told her he was willing to try this. If she wanted to fight for it, too, then she'd have come by now. Wouldn't she?

Or did she truly mean it when she told him she couldn't do this? Or maybe she was just too scared? He'd always been afraid she'd run... the fact that she didn't had meant something major. And she was still sticking around.

He... maybe if he just... checked on her. Figured out where she stood. He checked the clock. Nearly closing time... he didn't have any case to bring to her... but who cared? They would be getting ready to leave, and besides... she was more important than that, anyways.

And he had to _know_.

* * *

She had made up her mind.

The silence had been killing her, and she just hadn't been able to... handle it.

Every time the door opened, she looked up, desperately hoping that it was him who was striding confidently towards her, ready to talk, to ask her again... to just show her that he needed her as much as she needed him and he didn't actually want to move on. That he wanted to help her work through this, and learn how to be like him. To learn how to not end this badly.

Because if it ended with them both heartbroken... she didn't know how she would survive it.

So she did the only thing she knew how to do in this situation. She dragged Angela aside, gave her very specific instructions, made several promises, and then hurried out of the Jeffersonian, back to her apartment... and began to pack.

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**Hey, I said it was short. Next one will be up soon enough. **

**And for goodness sake don't panic about that last line. I promise that this will _not_ become a horribly angsty story. I have something planned, and it's important for the overall story line.  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**A longer chapter this time :) This story is shaping up to be a... bit longer than I planned on it being. I'm working on getting it under control, though. Which isn't easy. Apparently my tired muse is happy with this story, and wants to keep it rather than going back to What Brings Them Together. Oh well, for now I'll let it run its course.  
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"Where's Bones?" he asked, frowning as he looked around the lab. There were still plenty of lab workers around, busily going about their jobs, but her office was dark and she wasn't on the platform. Angela looked up from the sketch she'd been doing when he spoke, and hastily hid it from him before standing up to come and face him directly.

"Well, what brings you here?" she asked. The cold tone didn't go unnoticed. Clearly she was not pleased with him for what had transpired between him and Brennan. Well, she was Brennan's best friend... it wasn't like he shouldn't have expected something like this.

"I, uh... wanted to see her."

Angela gave a slight humorless laugh, and he winced.

"She's not here, Booth. In fact, thanks to you, I'm not sure she's even coming back."

"What are you talking about?" he asked, his voice firmly edged, but the fear starting to reach him as he tried to grasp what she could possibly mean by that statement.

"You've been avoiding her for the past few days. After you pretty much told her you were going to move on without her."

"Whoa, whoa! You definitely didn't get the full story," he tried to defend quickly. "I told her that I wanted to _try_. That I wanted to have a relationship with her. And she told _me_, that she couldn't change who she was. Ange, if she had been willing to try, I would have done absolutely everything to make sure that-"

"No," Ange was shaking her head. "I already know all that. I got a word-for-word replay, in fact."

He stared at her for a long moment. "Ange, where is she?"

"Gone."

He gritted his teeth. "Gone _where?"_

She shrugged. "I wouldn't know."

"We both know that's a lie. Ange, I need to find her."

She raised her eyebrows. "Convince me."

He groaned and tilted his head back. This was a waste of time. What if she was already on her way out of the country? Was Ange trying to delay him? He turned away from her, yanked out his cell phone, and dialed a friend at the FBI, asking him to look into whether or not she'd booked any flights. _Then_ he turned back to Angela, who, frustratingly, looked amused.

"Do you really intend to move on?" she asked before he could say anything.

"What?"

Angela sighed, and then continued as if she was speaking to a small child. "You told her that because she couldn't love you, you were going to move on and find someone that _could_. Do you actually intend to do that, or were you trying to get some sort of reaction from her?"

"If things don't work out with us, then yeah, I'm going to move on, Ange. I can't chase her for the rest of my life, not if she isn't willing to try."

She raised her eyebrows and then said cryptically. "She isn't? And what gave you that impression?"

His mind raced. "I... she told me that she couldn't change."

"Really? And what else?"

He pushed back, to recall her exact words. "That she didn't know how to, and that I..." he gritted his teeth and said irritably, "That I needed to be _protected_ from her."

"Hmm," Ange murmured, her eyes lit with a bit too much interest, but also dark with what he realized in wonder was actually some form of... anger. "And what did you tell her when she said that, since you clearly don't agree?"

Who was she, Sweets?

"I wasn't really focusing on that, I was focusing on the fact that she wouldn't say yes and just make a... I don't know, an _attempt_. She means everything to me, and I... I really thought I meant that much to her, too."

"What did you say, though? What did she _hear_, in response to everything she said?"

He cast himself back again, trying to remember the full details of what she'd said, even though he already knew his own response.

_"I... I am not a gambler. I'm a scientist! I can't change; I don't know how... I don't know how." He just stared at her blankly, and the tears on her face sparkled sorrowfully. "Please... don't look so sad."_

_ He turned away, and leaned against the nearest supportive feature he could find. "You're right." He looked away and shook his head. "You're right."_

_ She was still tearing up as she asked, a desperate edge to her voice, "Can we still work together?"_

_ He looked away, caught up in what that meant. Could he still spend all day with her, still be the same partner she needed, after she had turned him down?_

_ "Yeah," he sighed at last, as he saw the tears continue to build up in her eyes. He could tell she wanted to still work with him. That she was helplessly hoping that they could still keep that relationship, even if she didn't want another one. Maybe there was some hope, even if it was only a faint glimmer._

_ "Thank you," she half-whispered._

_ He took a deep breath. She had to know, and now, that he wasn't going to spend forever on a pointless mission. If she didn't want this, he wouldn't keep chasing it. "But I gotta move on." She continued to stare forward, her face unreadable except for the deep sadness that clouded it. "Y'know, I gotta find someone who's... who's gunna love me in... thirty years, or forty, or fifty..." _

_ "I know." Her voice was choked and... broken. _

Angela was still waiting patiently for an answer.

"She said she didn't know how to change... and I told her I knew."

"And how do you think she took that?"

"She asked if we could still work together. But you already know this, right? Why are you asking me?"

"Because you haven't figured some things out quite yet," she said with a sigh. The psychologist manner that she'd taken on suddenly faded away and left her as just the sad best friend. "This is the part I'm not supposed to say... but I just can't stand by," she explained.

"Ange, what are you talking about?" he asked in bewilderment. He had taken just about all he could today of the confusing stuff she was spewing to him. And he still had no idea where Bones was, or if he was... if he was ever going to see her again.

As if his phone read his mind, it chose that time to beep with an incoming text. He glanced at Angela, and then pulled it from his pocket and flipped it open.

_'Your lady scientist hasn't had any credit card activity in the past few days. Couldn't find her on any flight rosters either.'_

_'Thanks,'_ he sent back quickly, and then snapped the phone shut and gave the woman in front of him all his attention, waiting for a further explanation.

"Booth, I like you," she said finally. "You've been everything to Brennan. And as you know, I barely knew her when you two first met. But after that... beyond being the reason that she has been so happy these past five years... you're the reason the two of us stayed so close. You brought the cases that kept us working side by side... and somewhere along the way I decided not to go to Paris at all, like I'd originally planned to.

"Brennan would kill me if she knew I told you this, but I know that there are worse things that could happen. The two of you... if I let you fall apart, keep going on the way you are, I'll never have a free conscience again. And I'll have to live knowing that my best friend is miserable forever because she lost out on the greatest thing that ever happened to her. And no, before you even say it, this isn't just her fault. She might have turned you down, but she had reason. And the fact that you didn't see it hurt her a lot more than I think she's willing to admit to anyone, even me."

He stared at her in surprise, waiting for her to continue. What exactly did she mean? What did she have to say that would get Brennan so furious with her? What was he _missing _here?

"She told you that she couldn't have a relationship with you. Booth, what was the _first_ reason she gave you, after she pushed you away?"

"That she... she claimed that I needed to be protected from her." He hated the way those words sounded.

"And why was that?"

He took a breath, looking away, "She said she didn't have my kind of open heart."

"Uh huh. Exactly. What do you think about that? Do you _agree_ with it?"

"Of course not," he scoffed. "Bones has the most open heart I've ever found. She just doesn't like to show it much... but she knows how to open herself up."

"Right. So... when she went on and told you that she didn't know how to change, how to be anything but a scientist, how to have that open heart like you do... what was the next thing you told her?"

"I said... I told her that she was-" he stopped abruptly, and Angela grinned in triumph.

"See, the light has finally dawned," she said calmly.

"She can't possibly think that I believe she's incapable of changing."

"Why would she think otherwise, Booth? What else could you have been referring to when you said she was right_?"_

"But she wasn't willing to _try_," he said desperately. "I wanted her to change _that_, and realize that she could change! If she just tried... we could start something great. And she _knows_ that I'd be there for her every step of the way. I always have been, through everything we've done together. She must know I love her!"

"Of course she does. Why else would she be so confused when one second you're telling her you _knew_ she was the one, and you look so hurt when she turns you down... and the next you're informing her, just like that, that you're going to move on, and find someone that _can_ love you. Someone that's _capable _of giving you what you need. Since, well, clearly she isn't..."

He stared blankly, reading double-meanings into every single word he'd said to her that night. He'd been hurt, and lost... wondering why she didn't even want to give him a chance. And all along she'd been worried about hurting him... _protecting_ him from _herself_... and he'd said she was right.

"Ange, where is she?" he asked desperately.

"Hotel," she answered simply, pulling a piece of paper from her pocket and passing it over to him. There was a hotel named scrawled in Angela's curly handwriting, along with a room number. "She called me twenty minutes ago with the information, because I made her promise she would. I wasn't having her running off to Guatemala. No way."

He grinned, and pulled her into a tight hug. She gasped, and then let herself relax in his arms.

"Glad to see you're happy," she said, her voice muffled against his shirt.

He released his hold on her, and then grinned as she stepped back. "I don't think I can thank you enough. I've gotta go."

Without another word he turned and half-jogged out the doors, vanishing from the lab and leaving Angela to smile in satisfaction at where he'd disappeared.

All hope was not lost; the future looked brighter than it had in far too long.

* * *

**The next chapter is written and ready to go. I think I'll put it up in a few days. **

**Let me know what you thought of this one?  
**


	5. Chapter 5

When she had decided to leave, she still hadn't really known what she was doing. As she sat on the edge of the hotel bed, her overnight bag barely filled with anything and sitting unopened beside her, she contemplated what she could do from here.

Was it worth going back? It was nice to be... away. At least for a while. Would it feel just as good to be far from everything that she'd held as important to her? Maybe a year touring Europe, giving all those lectures she'd denied in the past... working on some of the most recent digs... it would be fascinating, but most importantly... it would get her mind off of her troubles.

Why she had even bothered to come here at all was nearly a mystery to her. What would it accomplish, other than isolating herself? It was a start, sure, but it wasn't like anyone was trying to find her other than Angela, who now knew where she was anyways.

Unless she was hoping that Booth would come searching for her.

Which was horribly stupid, because he hadn't bothered to even call her over the past few days. All the signs pointed to him wanting to avoid her entirely, and distance himself from her. If he found out she was gone... well, there was a good chance he'd be happy about it, rather than worried. He'd think she'd made the choice and made their lives easier. He wouldn't have to face the unpleasant possibility of working with her again, and he would be free to move on unhindered.

It would all be for the best.

Angela couldn't be trusted to give her the truth, so she would have to ask someone completely objective what Booth's reaction to her leaving had been. Then she would know for sure. Perhaps she could get a hold of Cam, who had always held Booth's interests the highest, even though the two of them were friends. She didn't dislike her boss for it, though. She always knew that Angela would have her side; it was only fair that Cam took Booth's. They'd known each other longer than she'd known Angela, anyways. And this way, she could find out how he was fairing without her there. If he was happier, more easy-going... well, she'd know she'd made the right choice.

Even if it would hurt so much that she wouldn't know how to move on herself.

A rapping at her door made her head snap up and her thoughts come back to the present. _Angela,_ she thought with an internal sigh. She never should have given her friend the information... she had probably gotten out of work and come straight here. Had decided to try to talk her into coming back and working things out. But that wasn't how it worked, and Angela should know it. She couldn't force Booth to do something he didn't want to. He needed someone that could love him... and she wasn't able to do that. Yes, she felt like she loved him... but she wouldn't be able to show it the way that he could. She couldn't give him the type of love that he wanted from her. And he knew that she never would be able to, because that was the way she was.

A good portion of her didn't want to answer the door at all. Wanted to just stay where she was. Pretend that the person had the wrong door. That she was sleeping. That she just wasn't in at all... maybe she'd gone for a walk or something. She didn't _have_ to answer.

"Bones?"

Her blood suddenly ran cold, and her heart nearly stopped before it started rocketing along at an unnatural pace. Her mind spun, unable to lock on a reasonable or rational line of thought.

"Bones, I know you're in there," he said. His voice was soft. Gentle. Filled with care. Pleading with her. "Come on, I just want to talk to you."

Shakily she got to her feet.

He was here. He was _here_. Surely that meant something? Surely he had sought her out, because he... what? She didn't even know. But right then, she wasn't willing to care. This meant something, and that was good enough.

Her hand latched onto the doorknob as the other one fumbled clumsily with the lock. When the chain fell down and swung, she slowly pulled the door open and stood in the opening, staring at him helplessly, not sure whether to smile, or glare... there were so many things that a former version of herself might have reacted with, that simply no longer fit her. She felt lost and confused, things that she wasn't familiar with in recent history, and most certainly didn't approve of being reacquainted with.

He stood there, just staring at her for a long moment, and she couldn't help but stare back. She hadn't seen him in several days... it felt weird to just be facing him. After she'd gotten back from her trip the previous summer, she remembered them just hugging each other the instant they reunited in her office, so happy to see each other again. After that, they'd barely been apart for more than a day at a time. Now... they just stood there, on opposite sides of the threshold. Watching each other.

"Can I... uh..." he gestured towards the hotel room awkwardly, and she hurriedly stepped out of the way, making room for him to get past.

With the door shut behind him, she stood near it, arms crossed over her chest, shifting her foot uncomfortably and worrying her lip.

"I, uh... went over to the lab. You weren't there."

"You... went to the lab?" she asked, unable to disguise her surprise at that.

He winced slightly, recognizing the emotion in her voice instantly. "Yeah." He coughed slightly, looking away and then flicking his eyes back again. "I wanted to... see you. I..." he ran a hand through his hair. "I missed you, Bones," he mumbled.

The warmth that single statement sent through her was beyond words. She blinked at him in shock for a few seconds, letting a slight smile turn up the corner of her lips. He caught sight of it, and mirrored it with his own, a small twinkle shining in his eyes.

"I missed you, too," she responded softly.

His smile widened slightly, but then his face became serious again, as he spoke. "I wanted to come see you sooner... but I didn't know what to say. And I just didn't want to... do the wrong thing."

"I thought..." she took a deep breath, her smile gone completely now. "Booth, we can't just... if you want to move on I don't want to hold you back. And as long as I'm here, you-"

"As long as we're both in this same universe," he cut her off, "It wouldn't make any difference at all." He shook his head. "Bones, I can't move on. Not without you."

Her heart hammered, and she desperately wanted to believe him.

"I can't," she whispered, "Booth, I can't be..." A sob broke through, and she fought back the tears that welled so easily in her eyes. She hated how easily he could get to her like this. How easily she fell apart when it came to him. But that was what made him so... special, she supposed. No one else could evoke such strong emotion from her. "I can't be the person you want me to be," she whispered, her voice small as she stared at him with watering eyes, her right arm hanging limply with the left arm latched onto it, rubbing up and down self consciously as her eyes flickered away from him the moment she was done speaking.

"You're the only woman I've ever wanted like this," he said, stepping closer to her and turning her face towards him with a gentle touch to her chin. A shiver passed through her. "And it doesn't matter. None of it matters. Bones, when I told you that... that I knew you didn't know how to change... that's what I meant. That you didn't _know_ how to change. And you don't; we both know that. But... I didn't tell you what I should have said then. That I can help you change. If... you want to."

"You... you'll help me?" she choked out, her eyes shining, "You want me to... you don't want to find someone that can... that's capable of..." she looked away, "That isn't cold and-"

"Shh..." he murmured in her ear as he pulled her close to him. "Bones, you are _not_ cold. And you..." he chuckled softly, the vibrations shaking her and making the warmth that he'd spread through her circulate faster. Her heart was still racing. "You, Bones, I do believe, have the highest learning curve of anyone I've ever met."

She laughed in response through her tears, her eyes closed as her arms tightened their hold around him.

He pulled away, and she stifled a sob that came forward almost instantly, even though her eyes were sparkling with happiness. He still kept his arms rested on hers, his face less than a foot away as he looked seriously into her eyes.

"Do you want to try this, Bones?"

She nodded desperately, her eyes brighter than they'd been in days, a huge smile worming its way across her face and breaking out like the sun from behind a curtain of clouds that had been holding it captive. He grinned widely in response, and then searched her eyes with his own as he leaned closer. Instantly she cleared the remaining few inches and pressed her lips against his.

And then they were lost in their own perfect paradise.

Home, at last, in each others' arms.

* * *

**This is soo short, but I couldn't seem to make it any longer...**

**So, would you like an epilogue, or do you prefer it if I leave the story right here?**

**And thanks again, as always, for all the reviews I have received on this story. I truly appreciate every comment :)**

**Oh, and I almost forgot. If you were interested in reading a story where Brennan left, I now have a oneshot up about that very thing, titled 'Separate Paths.' Check it out if you like :)  
**


	6. Epilogue

**Well, you ask for an epilogue and I give you this massive thing that just sort of... happened. I hope you enjoy it, and I'm glad you've taken the time to read this story through!  
**

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A foot tapped in the silence, as they stared across the expanse between their couch and his chair. Normally, she would have reached across to stop his incessantly bouncing leg, but today she was just as nervous as he was. She was surprised her own body wasn't giving off some sort of reaction, the way Booth's was. Her hands lay clamped together on her lap, and she sat stiffly, not moving at all as she stared calmly at the psychologist.

Internally, she was far from calm. They had broken the stalemate, as Sweets had called it on that night, and now they stood at the start of something else entirely. At Booth's suggestion, the two of them had taken some time off to adjust to the new... arrangement. A week away from skeletons, with just the two of them.

It had been far more amazing than she had predicted. Booth had insisted on taking things slow, rather than diving straight into bed, and while a good portion of her brain had been rather annoyed by this turn of events, her rational side was now glad that he was who he was. Because with anyone else, that was the way things would have played out. Instead, he took her to dinner, insisted on watching pointless movies on his couch, and made her laugh about things that only he could make amusing for her.

And not once had they veered off into discussing murder, or the FBI, or even the Jeffersonian. They were in a world of their own, only fifteen minutes or so from their workplace... and yet they were completely free of it. For the first time, she had appreciated what it might be like if work wasn't the only thing in her life. This wasn't like it was with Sully, where she had been eager to get away from work to be with him. This was like another part of... everything. Her priorities were entirely rearranged.

What had surprised her most, though, was that she had rather quickly realized that they hadn't suddenly changed as a reaction to the new situation with her partner. Rather, they had been altering for all the years that she had known them. She had been _changing_... and she hadn't even acknowledged it, from how slowly it had come about.

If he had asked her to sail off to the Caribbean with him for a year, and there was no set path for what would follow after that... she would probably have accepted.

And that was terrifying, but also... exhilarating. Life was unpredictable, as she'd always claimed, but now it was unpredictable in a _good_ way.

Sweets, though, didn't seem nearly as excited about the changing circumstances as they did.

"This is going to ruin your partnership," he said quietly into the silence.

She made no comment, and it was Booth who spoke up. "And... who's fault is this, again?"

"Mine," he answered heavily, which made her eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Booth looked equally amazed; neither of them had been expecting him to outright confess to it. "I've been an _idiot_."

"Whoa, hold up a sec. Let's go back to the part where you actually accepted the blame."

"I've been trying too hard for this, and now we're _all_ gonna lose our jobs..."

She shot Booth a look when he turned to her with a helpless expression on his face, and he sighed and turned back to the younger man, who was now hunched over with his head rested in his hands.

"Okay, Sweets, maybe this is a bit... messed up, yeah. But seriously, we _are_ messed up. I think we figured that out a while ago."

"That is actually pretty true," she spoke up at last with an agreeing nod.

Booth shot her a look that said quite plainly _not helping, Bones_.

"We've been working together for five years now, with all our... issues. And I doubt anything's going to affect the way we solve crime. Right, Bones?"

She stared at his outstretched fist for a second, and then grinned and bumped hers against it. He chuckled and turned back to the still forlorn psychologist.

"Hacker is going to _kill_ me..." he muttered, to seemingly no one in particular.

"Not if our solve rate goes up, he won't," Brennan reasoned. "He's the boss; it makes him look good if his department is successful. And his superiors are more likely to look at the numbers than to investigate into what sort of relationships are going on beneath them. Not if those relationships aren't doing anything bad for the results."

Booth grinned at her, and she felt a bit of relief that she had actually managed to say the right thing. Sweets was looking somewhat hopeful, but still not thrilled.

"He's still not going to like this, though, because he's personally invested."

Booth's face darkened instantly, and he put an arm on top of the couch so that it rested somewhat close to her shoulders. Possessively. She rolled her eyes, but didn't feel the need to complain or move away.

"If Hacker tries to fire any of us because he's mad that Bones isn't interested in him, then he'll regret it."

"I never said I wasn't interested in him," she pointed out.

"I- what?"

"I didn't," she answered honestly. "But... that doesn't mean I'm not more interested in _you_."

Instantly a wide grin spread across his face. "I think I can... accept that," he murmured as he gently pulled her face towards him and kissed her.

Sweets coughed, and they pulled apart. She didn't feel nearly as embarrassed as she had expected to feel. She glanced at Booth, who was glancing at her as well. A sigh from Sweets brought their attention back to him.

"Okay, so you two clearly are enjoying yourselves," he said, "But there are a few things that you need to know. _If_ you somehow manage to get away with keeping your partnership at work..."

"You mean _if_ you decide to approve it and give Hacker that opinion," she helpfully pointed out.

He seemed to ignore her as he went on, "You have to understand that there are certain things that are going to affect your lives from that. For one, you'll have to have extra therapy sessions with me, which will be mandatory."

"Oh great, he's getting into teacher mode again," Booth muttered, but she could tell there was a smile hiding behind the comment. He was pleased that their shrink seemed to be recovering from his earlier panic.

"And we'll need to discuss your relationship in these sessions as _well_ as your working partnership."

"Whoa, isn't that a bit... much?"

"Not if you want to keep your current job status it isn't. And I think now would be a good place to start, because you already have some issues that are being covered up by your current... status."

"So what, you think this is some sort of newlywed phase that we're going to get over?" she asked incredulously.

"After watching the two of you for the past few years? No. But, regardless of what you might think, I am very invested in the success of your partnership _and_ your personal relationship. Which is why I just talked myself into helping you, for some crazy reason.

"Booth, how much have you told her about the dream you had during your comatose state? Or your following revelations?"

"Hey!" Booth snapped, "That's private! You have no right to-"

"But I have reason." Whatever Sweets had been thinking about in the past few minutes, it must have been very powerful, because she'd never seen so much resolve in his young eyes. He was clearly determined to follow through with whatever this was he had in mind. "I want you two to work out. I want to see this relationship succeed. Why do you think I lost my head last week and told you to go for it when I _knew_ it wouldn't end well?"

"You _knew?"_ Brennan broke in, her eyebrows turned down in a confused frown. "How could you have known what would and wouldn't happen between us once we left that office? You even believed we were actually going to go get dinner, and I remember you being very disappointed over that fact."

"Yes, well, I knew that Booth would go through with it at some point. And I knew that it _had_ to happen... and I had a good guess that it wouldn't end well for either of you. But I knew it had to happen in order for anything _else_ to _ever_ happen. And you got to that part a lot faster than I expected. Which is, again, why I have gone temporarily insane and decided to try to pull this off around Hacker."

They were both silent, and he glanced back and forth between them as if expecting a response. When none was forthcoming, he went on.

"Right. So, Booth, why don't we start with the brain scans?"

"Are you nuts?"

Brennan glanced between the two of them, "Is there something I don't..." she froze then, and her eyes widened and locked firmly on his. "Booth, what is he talking about? The surgery... they got everything out, they did. I saw it. Is there... there can't be something else wrong..."

"No, no! God, no, nothing like that," he said, his hands gently resting on her arms to relax her. She breathed in a deep sigh of relief, but still felt concerned about the look in his eyes, which was telling her that he didn't want to explain whatever it was that Sweets was bringing up.

"I'm trying to help," Sweets said simply when Booth turned to glare at him. "If you don't tell each other everything, then you aren't going to be able to make this work in the long run. It will be great, but it won't last forever. And neither of you would survive that. There are still doubts here, and you both must know that Dr. Brennan, especially, struggles with doubts."

She cast him a look of reproach, but she knew he was right. Facts held life together, and when she didn't understand something, especially when it came to Booth... it worried her a lot more than she liked to let on. Somehow, Sweets had picked up on that.

"What doubts does she have, then?" Booth challenged the psychologist, who immediately turned to her.

"Dr. Brennan, why do you think it is that Booth pushed you away following your return from Guatemala? Why do you think he told you he loved you, and then took it back?"

Her eyes flicked to Booth, who was watching her with concern, and then away.

She didn't know. Did she want to know?

He turned to Booth. "Why do you think it is that Dr. Brennan, who never wanted children, ever, suddenly decided to have a baby, and asked you to be the father?"

"We're leaving," Booth said firmly, glaring at Sweets as he got to his feet. More hesitantly, she did as well.

The shrink nodded and leaned back in his chair as they made their way out.

"Sometimes I really dislike him," Booth muttered when they were seated in his SUV. She didn't answer, and he turned in his seat so he was facing her more directly. "I guess sometimes he's right, though."

She just nodded slightly, and he turned to face the wheel with a sigh, and then drove them back to her apartment.

"Can I... come up?" he asked as he put the vehicle in park out front.

She bit her lip and nodded before letting herself out and starting towards the stairs. He hurriedly caught up to her, but they were silent until the door of the apartment was shut behind them and they were alone in her dark apartment. The lights, once she flicked them on, seemed too bright. They both stood stiffly, rather than sitting down together on the couch like they normally would have.

"Alright, so, now that Sweets has you thinking about all of that... I guess I have no option but to explain it, right?"

"What did he mean by brain scans?" she asked instantly, trying to stall the discussion about when he'd told her he loved her.

He sighed. "After I woke up from my coma, I realized some things. I realized that... I wanted to do something about you and me. Sweets pulled me aside and he showed me some brain scans that had been taken before, during, and after the surgery. He said some crap about chemicals that show love, and told me..." he stared at her, his eyes dark, and then he shook his head. "No, alright? No. You have to know this first, okay, Bones? You have to know that... that I love you. That I will _never_ stop loving you, no matter what happens. I can't. You're everything to me."

Her breath caught in her throat at his words, and his hands rested on her shoulders, his eyes boring into her as if willing her to believe it.

"I know," she whispered back. He breathed out a shaky sigh and wrapped his arms around her warmly. "What did he tell you about the brain scans?" she asked into his shoulder, and he pulled away, making her breath catch again at the sudden loss of warmth and closeness.

"He told me I didn't love you before the dream," he whispered helplessly.

"The... scans didn't show activity before the surgery?" she asked, her eyebrows coming together. She felt the faintest tinges of fear coming over her. "It... was their activity present during your comatose state?" He nodded weakly, and she felt the world beginning to shatter. "And after?" she managed to choke out.

"God, Bones, please," he said desperately, reaching out as she stepped back. His arm fell limply at his side as he stared at her, his eyes pleading, "Bones, I love you. That's what you need to know. And why the hell Sweets thinks the dream has anything to do with it is beyond me."

"Science," she answered, her voice struggling to continue forming coherent words. "Science tells us that... that love is a chemical reaction, that it... that it can be seen on scans like those that were... performed on you. It's an emotion, but the... the chemicals are the proof that it... that it _exists_."

"I love you," he repeated. "Bones, I look at you, and I don't ever want to stop. You make me smile, and laugh, and you're brilliant, and strong, and beautiful, and everything that I've ever wanted. And there's nothing that could-"

"Stop," she whispered, and he broke off, staring at her sorrowfully. "The dream, Booth. I... you didn't come up with it yourself."

He frowned, and then shook his head, "Bones, what are you-"

"Let me finish. I _made_ that dream. _Me_. I wrote it out, because... because you were in a goddamn coma!" her voice was rising and her emotions were getting the best of her, but she didn't have the strength to fight them off. Not anymore. Not tonight. "Because for the... for the second time, I was... you were _gone!_ And I couldn't handle that, okay? This is... this is all because of me! Don't you _get _it? Oh god..." she stepped further away, shaking her head frantically. "Booth, I'm the one that's in love with you. I'm the one that had those emotions. My... if they took brain scans of _my_ head, it would have shown it lit up like a goddamn Christmas tree! And I went ahead and I... I transferred it right to you!"

"Bones!" he shouted, and she stared at him, her chest heaving, her mouth still open, and her eyes blazing. "I have always loved you, alright?" his voice was far too quiet and gentle in contrast to the shouting that had just been ringing through the room. "When we first met, I was fascinated by you. And then, when we fell apart and, well, hated each other? I was still fascinated. I wanted to learn more, and I wanted to _understand_. And once I did... I saw _you_. I saw who you were, under all the science terms and the intelligence... and I... Bones, it amazed me. And I loved it, alright? I remember... God, I remember the first time I made you laugh, actually full out laugh, when neither of us was drunk or angry... and that sound was incredible. And I wanted you to do it again. Because it made me happy to see you happy. And that's a major part of what loving you is all about."

"Why, then," she choked out, "Why?"

Clearly he understood her meaning even though she wasn't capable of articulating it at that point, because he answered immediately. "Because I didn't know." She stared at him in confusion, and he went on, "I didn't know I was in love with you. I wanted to spend all my time with you, and you made me unbelievably happy, but I didn't know I was in love with you. I didn't think about a... relationship, about what that would mean, because all I saw in that was a million and one ways to lose you forever. And I didn't want to do that. I can't tell you why the damn brain scan didn't show it, but hey, I was pretty concerned about the whole tumor thing at that point, and I had been pretty stressed, to tell you the truth, about the baby thing too."

She sucked in a sharp breath. The other question Sweets had brought up.

"And about... when you told me that you..?" She knew she was stalling away from it, but she might as well have all her questions answered before he started asking his. She didn't even know what she was going to tell him, to be honest.

"That was because of the scans," he said gently. "I knew I loved you, then, but I was still confused about where you and I stood, and when Sweets told me that it had all been created by the coma... I didn't believe him, but at the same time I was terrified he was right. Because, if he was..." he looked away and shook his head. "I couldn't bear the idea that someday I might not feel the same. At that point... I was having a hard time remembering things about my old self. The tie, the socks, clowns... the way I had felt prior to the dream. It came back, slowly, but that was after I chickened out of telling you the truth. I wasn't going to tell you unless I was absolutely certain that I wouldn't end up hurting you. And _that_ is why I told you last week. Because I _know_, with every fiber of who I am, that I am in love with you. It's not a dream, it's not going to fade... it's real."

She stared at him for a moment, taking in everything that he'd just told her in the past ten minutes or so, and then she wrapped her arms around him and pressed her lips warmly to his. He moaned approvingly, and moved his lips against hers, his hands rubbing up her back, one of them tangling its way into her hair.

"You haven't told me... about the baby..." he murmured softly against her skin as he tilted his head away slightly. Slowly, she pulled her arms back to her own sides and ran her tongue over her lips, tasting him there as well as trying to give herself time to think. He was watching her with interest and a bit of confusion as well.

"I suppose it doesn't matter, now that I told you I came up with the dream you had while you were in your coma," she murmured. "And... you know me better than anyone else, anyways." She sat down on the edge of one of the cushions on her couch, and he came to sit beside her, still watching her patiently. "I didn't understand what it meant to have someone love you," she whispered. "I didn't think I ever would, a lot of the time. I guess I just didn't... read the signs," she added quietly. He smiled softly, obviously understanding her meaning that she had accepted that he was in love with her before the coma. "I thought that... I know that scientifically, a mother and child share a connection unlike any other in the natural world. I wanted to... feel that. Unconditional love."

"And my sperm..?"

"I wanted it to be... a connection between us, because I thought that... if any child I had could love me, it would be yours."

He stared at her with his mouth open for a moment, and she looked away self-consciously. A finger nudged her chin back so she was facing him once more. "Any child of yours would love you," he whispered gently. "There's no way they wouldn't."

He kissed her again, this time just a gentle caress, and then rested his forehead against hers as they lapsed into silence.

"Are we good?" she asked cautiously after a while. His eyes opened from where they had blissfully slid shut, and he smiled at her.

"Yeah, Bones, we're good. I love you."

"I love you, too," she answered, her eyes sparkling warmly. Those weren't words she'd ever pictured herself saying, especially not with so much warmth and honesty behind them.

"I think I might go crazy in these little sessions that Sweets has planned for us, though, if there anything like this one..."

She chuckled, "You won't be the only one."

"He is sticking his neck out for us, though. I guess I can appreciate that somewhat."

"Not too much, though," she countered. "If Hacker refuses to let us work together, I'll go convince him otherwise."

Booth outright laughed, and she found herself grinning as his eyes glowed with warmth. "I would actually be a little afraid if I was him," he managed after a minute.

"I can be very persuasive."

"And don't I know it."

"So," she said, her eyes suddenly shining with mischief. Her hands began deftly undoing his tie. "I think I can persuade you to follow me?"

"To the edge of the universe," he answered promptly, and then he pressed his lips to hers briefly before she turned and led the way to the bedroom.

There would be plenty of arguments to come, and plenty of laughs, and teasing, and any variety of things that could come up when it was the two of them... but tonight there would be no more argument from either of them.

Because two trusted each other, and two knew they loved each other, and even that it was unconditional... and they could become one. Forever more.

_Fin_

* * *

**Well... that's it! This has been one of the most enjoyable stories to work on, and I can't tell you how thrilled I am that it didn't randomly die like, um... some of my other stories. **

**Thank you so much to every single one of you who took the time to review! I say a thank you out loud to my iPod, many times accompanied by some sort of 'Aww... :)' every time I read your comments. Seriously, you guys are amazing. **

**Thank you for reading!!**

**~Jill  
**


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